Post by Death to ALL on Jul 8, 2006 15:56:49 GMT -5
> RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE
> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a
> little beverage, good food and companionship.
> She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
>
> 2. We also sleep in separate beds.
> Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
>
> 3. I take my wife everywhere.....
> but she keeps finding her way back.
>
> 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our
> anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"
> she said.
> So I suggested the kitchen.
>
> 5. We always hold hands.
> If I let go, she shops.
>
> 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric
> bread maker.
> She said "There are too many gadgets and no place
> to sit down!" .. So I bought her an electric chair.
>
> 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because
> there was water in the carburetor.
> I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."
>
> 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
> Then the mud fell off.
>
> 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late
> for the garbage?" ... The driver said "No, jump in!"
>
> 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
>
> 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her
> first name was Always.
>
> 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
> I don't like to interrupt her.
>
> 13. The last fight was my fault though.
> ! My wife asked "What's on the TV?"
> I said "Dust!"
>
> Can't you just hear him say all of these?
> I love it.........this is the good old days
> when humor didn't have to start with a four letter word........
>just clean and simple fun
> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a
> little beverage, good food and companionship.
> She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
>
> 2. We also sleep in separate beds.
> Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
>
> 3. I take my wife everywhere.....
> but she keeps finding her way back.
>
> 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our
> anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"
> she said.
> So I suggested the kitchen.
>
> 5. We always hold hands.
> If I let go, she shops.
>
> 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric
> bread maker.
> She said "There are too many gadgets and no place
> to sit down!" .. So I bought her an electric chair.
>
> 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because
> there was water in the carburetor.
> I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."
>
> 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
> Then the mud fell off.
>
> 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late
> for the garbage?" ... The driver said "No, jump in!"
>
> 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
>
> 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her
> first name was Always.
>
> 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
> I don't like to interrupt her.
>
> 13. The last fight was my fault though.
> ! My wife asked "What's on the TV?"
> I said "Dust!"
>
> Can't you just hear him say all of these?
> I love it.........this is the good old days
> when humor didn't have to start with a four letter word........
>just clean and simple fun